This was a GREAT day!

At 6:30 am. My Brother James and I took off for a 7:00 MRI and my Beloved Roswell Park Cancer Center. The morning was lovely and I felt like driving as my vision has cleared and I feel so good in the mornings. Merril was on his way too and we watched each other as we made the exchange from freeway to freeway into the city.

Anyway, the MRI was early so James and I sat and talked as we waited for the 9:30am Doctors to come in and read the results. They were early and by 9:00 we were sitting there hearing that the lesions in my brain had been all but destroyed by the radiation treatment. They expect in the next few days that all will be GONE...GONE!

This is something, you have all been praying for and something I just the past few days found the faith to ask. How can I express how very grateful I am for this tender mercy. I can only share this scripture I read shortly after I got so sick.


Moroni 7: 27 Wherefore, my beloved brethren, have miracles ceased because Christ hath ascended into heaven, and hath sat down on the right hand of God, to claim of the Father his rights of mercy which he hath upon the children of men?
28 For he hath answered the ends of the law, and he claimeth all those who have faith in him; and they who have faith in him will cleave unto every good thing; wherefore he advocateth the cause of the children of men; and he dwelleth eternally in the heavens.
29 And because he hath done this, my beloved brethren, have miracles ceased? Behold I say unto you, Nay; neither have aangels ceased to minister unto the children of men.
30 For behold, they are subject unto him, to minister according to the word of his command, showing themselves unto them of strong faith and a firm mind in every form of godliness.

I have been thinking of all the prayers, cards, flowers, cinnamon bears, cards, flowers, Meals, flowers, Pajamas, e mail, cards, Flowers, Food, cards, calls, hair, Love and more.

Flowers have covered my tables since my diagnosis.

The calls I was too sick to take or make and the ones I am now getting to. My dear friends and family who I have not seen me for years and those I see everyday who have given me a lift with their good wishes and most of all their prayers. Your fasting and your faith in my behalf. How blessed I am and thankful for this wonderful life and just a little more time to live and love.

"Aliens in Roswell" By her brother James

Susan is recieving her chemotherapy at the Roswell Cancer Center in Buffalo New York and I am sitting here with her.
The Irony of the name and the alien nature of the things that they try to do here is not lost on me. Gladly Susan knows that my dimented sense of humor crosses all boundries. Facing mortality is no different.

The good news is that we are not in Roswell, New Mexico. Although conspiracies continue to proliferate that the U.S. Airforce moves Roswell on a regular basis in order to validate conspiracy theorists.

While I am watching her drift in and out of Benedryl-induced sleep I can't resist quoting Yogi Breea who said"it is dejavu all over again". It's been almost 15 years since I sat in a similar infusion suite with my ex-wife going through similar treatment. It is a helpless feeling reguardless of the prognosis.

While at Susan's I am sorting and packing stuff from my divorce that I had left in her basement five years ago. In the meantime Susan has bought a lable maker to label all her posessions in case she dosn't make it. The fact that she finds more joy in this than the melancoly I am feeling is a paradox. We are both closing doors on old lives and unsure of our new ones. I can only assume that Joseph Smith's advice that if we knew the beauty and joy of the next life we would be motivated to leave this one.

Susan knows where she is going next.

I don't.

But then, only God really knows when.

I walked into a closed screen door yesterday and almost grated myself into the next life. So who knows!

So Susan is spending far more time and effort resigning from her many committies than the committie members are using in performing their duties. All the time saying she needs a nap.....meanwhile I am the one nodding off listening to her phone calls.

She told me that she loves cooking, cleaning, ironing, gardening and taking care of Merril. So while here, I have only stepped in to help if she seems to need it. Her life has been so full. I watch her movements with envy.

My week with her is half over. Mom asks each day if we are hugging each other. We haven't ever been huggers so we haven't started now. To me it would signify a change in our relationship and I refuse to mess up something that has been so good.

"It ain't broke ... so why fix it!"

I found pictures of Susan and me when we were ages two and three...we look like two deer in the hearlights. And I guess we were...and still are. But we still don't blink because neither of us have ever wanted to miss anything. And we won't!

Okay, so here it is.

We are all dying.

But looking forward to not missing death is the foundation of our mutually insatiable curiosity. I hope we live another fifty years. But knowing that we really will live forever( even if we are not here) is so exciting! Reminds me of the warning we recieved when boarding the rollercoaster at Lagoon "HAVE FUN and GOOD LUCK!" Then we screammed our lungs out, sometimes lost our lunch and held on for dear life! But when we got back we pleaded to go again! Just like now...taking a roller coaster ride through Roswell.

I love you Susan,

Your Brother,

James

PS. We think these pictures are 1952. Susan is 20 months younger than me.

My Sister, Cynthia

My sister
I just spent a few days with my daughter in laws in NYC. It was. Amazing and information for another blog but it did start me thinking about sisters.
I only have one. She is an amazing person and so important to me. I bet she has no idea how incredible she is and the impact she has had on my life.



Cynthia was just about three years younger than me. She was just younger enough that she was in elementary when I was experiencing Jr. High angst and by the time she experiencing her own Jr. High trauma I was oblivious and on to high school intrigue.
By the time she was in high school I had moved on to BYU. Though we shared a room all of our had matching dresses for most holidays, received the same dolls in identical clothing we did not spend much time together as kids. Being just a year behind James I hung around with he and friends and Cynthia and her friends where on a different weave length most of the time.





Cynthia went about her life quietly making good choices like that of her husband. Eric is the kindest, most considerate husband and father ever. He would move the moon for Cynthia if asked. Everything she wants or needs he provides for her. They love doing things together like riding motorcycles and traveling to fun locations with their kids. This amazing family spends tons of time together as many of them are working together in Eric’s business.
As I went about dating like crazy, being engaged, writing a missionary. On, off and braking and having my heat broken. Cynthia just picked a really great man and got about building an amazing marriage.

We actually got engaged and married the same year.
For her colors she Choose every pastel in the rainbow which left me with red which pretty much describes our lives. She has lived with her family, In the same community for most of her married life. Her wonderful kids are all married and filled her home with grandchildren. Her life has been for the most part ordered, peacfull and serene from the outside. We all have our times.

I have lived in SLC, Los Angeles, Iowa, back to SLC and now in Buffalo. For me it is a mammoth undertaking to get my kids together. Hers can come by every Sunday if they want and most of them live within 10 miles of her. Can I tell you how envy this…….Her energy and ability to be and enjoy being a grandparent? She is also a caring daughter in law. Eric is from a family of boys and Cynthia has loved his Mother as if she were her own with Helping, caring, holidays and events. Just recently she helper her move north from St George to get additional care for Eric's father. She, Eric and two sons packer he up moved the lot and set up housekeeping with new furniture and amenities in their new dig in a matter of days.

We never more did one than one or two events as the four daughter in laws. We were all missing our lives with our families so much I don't remember much bonding. About 10 years ago my mother sprung for a trip to Europe for the three of us. Mom, Cynthia and Myself. It was wonderful. Cynthia and I were about the youngest on the tour and we had a ball exploring beyond the restructions of the tour. We saw and did thing that we had only dreamed of doing. I discovered a new adventurous side of my sister and we started to love each other as adults and friends.

Several years ago our family was in a severe accident. Jacky, one of Cynthia’s daughters was with us traveling to Lake Powel. From the canyon she called her folks for helps before the dust was settled. Eric and Cynthia came up the mountain. As my family was being life-flighted and sent by ambulance all over the Valley, Cynthia and Eric quietly collected all our belongs, food and preparations for a week at Lake Powell and took them to our home. For weeks I would stumbled upon their carefull handy work. Tears would roll down my cheeks thinking for their dear servicer to our family.

I only have one sister but she is a treasure. Sometimes if I can find her home I will call and see what is going on with her. The conversation usually starts slow as we catch up a bit on the parents or a currenting challenge but them if I can get her talking I am in for a treat of all the comings and goings of her fun family, filled with the delightful relationship of this family that work together and support each other.

I only have one sister. She is an amazing wife and mother and women I admire.

Mothers Day 2010 My Mother

My parents sent me a vase of roses this week with a card saying they hoped I would have 23 more mothers days. Wow, I would love that but the changes are not real good. In fact this just may the last chance I have to pay tribute to the amazing mother that has taught, nurtured and loved me. The Chemo seems to be working. I have high hopes for some good days ahead but I think Keeping foccus on today and tomarrow will be good for me just now.
I wake up early in the morning feeling good, rested and thinking, "What if anything can I do of value today".

My thoughts have been on my Mom for a week now. I will not write a history since she is the writer and has done a pretty good Job of documenting her life. I just wanted to touch on her influence on me and what she passed on of most values.
Her ability to Work, Create and make the world a better place continually by her Can do, Can do it better and Get involved attitude.

Mom has survived Cancer now three times and is 82. I am still in my fifties and counting down. It is hard that I cannot have that extra 20 years to keep doing what I love but her example of doing all you can while you can has shaped my years and given me a wonder full life

Well here is the list of the things my Mother could do and tried to teach me.

She could keep a house. Every Saturday we cleaned, did laundry, changed beds, moped floors and folded clothes. The rest of the week we lived in the house but once a week it was neet and tidy. Every day you made your bed, picked up your clothes and took care of your responsibilities.

Mom was the one every one wanted on the committee, the Primary, the PTA the lunch group the party planning team because she was a doer. She had ideas, energy, time and talent do do not only her part but more. When she was the Sunday school chorister she was the best with visual aids and fund songe for the kids. When she was the PTA president new things were tried and she flew up the ranks.

When she sewed for herself and her daughters everyone wanted he to sew for them. She found the best dance and music teachers she could find for us and then became the costume master designing the things we would wear or paying for lessons with dresses that matched her daughters.


When she dipped chocolates, made bread or built a tray of brownies she became your new best friend in hopes that you would be the lucky recipient of her gifts.

She would design a new Christmas tree these most years and make the decorations by hand. Gifts were always wraped with care in the best paper with lovely bows and displayed under the tree days bedore Christmas. Parties sparkled with her themed decorations. Never crape paper but always something classy.

We learned ot tie bows like a florest, crochet, kit, embroider and sew because that is just what you knew to do if you were a women.

For Mom everything from her being valedictorian in High school to the same as she graduated from BYU when we were in our teens was done perfectly. She was a perfect librarian, teacher and principal having her students know more, do more and accomplish great things because she believed she could and so could they. On special days we attend BYU with her. We were inspired to be better.

She has written books, kept family history alive, connected family members as they have grown apart and never misses to send out birthday and Christmas cards. She is loyal to friends both old and new. Every great grandchild knows that Grandma Thompson loves them, knows their names and remembers them on special days. She was as determined in the Grandparent roll. Each Christmas for years had it's theme with some sort of hand crafted gifts or personally selected items to bring the group together.

I have been driven to be just a shadow of this great lady as she studied the Gospel and learned to be a great missionary. Her spiritual strength was always solidly behind all these other achievements in fact the motivation to gain that principal of intelligence that she hoped would rise with her. I never did learn to make home made chocolates. I stopped sewing for myself soon after I got married. However her example of working to make things happen has stayed with me. If I am breathing I can do it, Make it better, nicer or sweeter for someone.

I love you mom for your example on how to live a rich and wonderful life. We are all better because you choise to be our Mother. Love, Susan

Thanks for all your prayers and expressions of love and concern. TODAY WAS A LITTLE HARD. I WAS GLAD Merril WAS WITH ME FOR THE NEWS. HERE IS MY, NOT SO SCIENTIFIC REPORT.
1. Chemo to start ASAP maybe next Wednesday
2. Cancer looks like it is in the liver, lungs and maybe bone's. Doing a biopsy on Wednesday of the liver OUCH (cannot do a bone Scan since the volcano is keeping the radioactive stuff they need to inject into my Cy borg veins grounded for NOW)
3. On Friday they are putting in a "medi port" this is a little port they put under your skin by the collar bone where they can put chemo drip or draw blood. I guess I will have it for the rest of my life and will actually be a Cy Borg before Dad who really wanted to be one.
4. They said that when breast cancer re accrues they treat the symptoms( like My breathing being cut off) with drugs (chemo hair distroying goo) until there is a response or until the patient says STOP i have had enough. Because it has been three years...since the first Chemo.... that means this is not a aggressive, but a slow growing cancer and possibly very recptive to the chemo(good for me, bad for Cancer but we don't care about IT).
Average survival for second onset breast cancer is three years. Since I am "ABOVE" average and "President of the WORLD" and "bossy" we will plan on longer, MUCH longer.
5. tHE GROWTH IN THE LUNGS IS ACTUALLY LYMPH NODES SITTING BY THE Bronci. They are most likely full of cancer.
6. We have to cancel out cruise to Greece but think this should be a very Buffalo Summer. Soo start looking at when you could come for a visit
7 The girls shopping trip to NYC is still on. They may have to get a MOM stroller for me but I am not going to miss this.
8. We will do Powell in October borg body or NO

Hope this answers most questions. I guess if there is any new news from the OUCH liver biopsy, I will let you know
Love, Cy Borg Sue/ Mom